From: [email protected]
Sent: Thursday, March 7, 2013 11:43 PM
Subject: Re: (no subject)
Lucky duck.
From: [email protected]
Sent: Thursday, March 7, 2013 11:44 PM
Subject: Re: (no subject)
Lucky pig, actually.
From: [email protected]
Sent: Thursday, March 7, 2013 11:48 PM
Subject: Re: (no subject)
Right! Hey, weren’t you running behind with something?
From: [email protected]
Sent: Thursday, March 7, 2013 11:51 PM
Subject: Re: (no subject)
Yeah, I should probably be getting back to it…
From: [email protected]
Sent: Thursday, March 7, 2013 11:55 PM
Subject: Re: (no subject)
Okay. Nice talking to you. And sorry I couldn’t come through for Wilbur.
From: [email protected]
Sent: Thursday, March 7, 2013 11:57 PM
Subject: Re: (no subject)
He’ll forgive you, I’m sure. He’s a very magnanimous pig.
From: [email protected]
Sent: Thursday, March 7, 2013 11:58 PM
Subject: Re: (no subject)
I’m relieved to hear that.
From: [email protected]
Sent: Friday, March 8, 2013 12:01 AM
Subject: Re: (no subject)
Hey, E?
From: [email protected]
Sent: Friday, March 8, 2013 12:02 AM
Subject: Re: (no subject)
Yes… G?
From: [email protected]
Sent: Friday, March 8, 2013 12:03 AM
Subject: Re: (no subject)
What if I e-mail you again tomorrow?
From: [email protected]
Sent: Friday, March 8, 2013 12:04 AM
Subject: Re: (no subject)
I don’t know. I’m not exactly in the habit of trolling the Internet for pen pals…
From: [email protected]
Sent: Friday, March 8, 2013 12:05 AM
Subject: Re: (no subject)
But?
From: [email protected]
Sent: Friday, March 8, 2013 12:07 AM
Subject: Re: (no subject)
But I’m also terrible at good-byes.
From: [email protected]
Sent: Friday, March 8, 2013 12:08 AM
Subject: Re: (no subject)
Okay then. I’ll just say hello again instead.
From: [email protected]
Sent: Friday, March 8, 2013 12:09 AM
Subject: Re: (no subject)
I like that better. And I’ll say: Good morning!
From: [email protected]
Sent: Friday, March 8, 2013 12:10 AM
Subject: Re: (no subject)
But it’s not morning…
From: [email protected]
Sent: Friday, March 8, 2013 12:12 AM
Subject: Re: (no subject)
It is in Maine.
From: [email protected]
Sent: Friday, March 8, 2013 12:13 AM
Subject: Re: (no subject)
Ah, right. Then: Howdy!
From: [email protected]
Sent: Friday, March 8, 2013 12:14 AM
Subject: Re: (no subject)
How very western of you. Greetings!
From: [email protected]
Sent: Friday, March 8, 2013 12:15 AM
Subject: Re: (no subject)
Are you an alien invader? Ni hao.
From: [email protected]
Sent: Friday, March 8, 2013 12:17 AM
Subject: Re: (no subject)
You definitely just looked that one up.
From: [email protected]
Sent: Friday, March 8, 2013 12:19 AM
Subject: Re: (no subject)
You don’t think I’m proficient in Chinese?
From: [email protected]
Sent: Friday, March 8, 2013 12:20 AM
Subject: Re: (no subject)
I do not.
From: [email protected]
Sent: Friday, March 8, 2013 12:21 AM
Subject: Re: (no subject)
Fair enough. Then, salutations! (That one was from Wilbur, of course.)
From: [email protected]
Sent: Friday, March 8, 2013 12:24 AM
Subject: Re: (no subject)
Of course. Until tomorrow…
From: [email protected]
Sent: Friday, March 8, 2013 12:25 AM
Subject: Re: (no subject)
Wait, is that your way of saying good-bye without really saying good-bye?
From: [email protected]
Sent: Friday, March 8, 2013 12:27 AM
Subject: Re: (no subject)
No. Actually, I’m not sure I’m quite finished saying hello yet.
From: [email protected]
Sent: Friday, March 8, 2013 12:30 AM
Subject: Re: (no subject)
Me neither. Hello.
From: [email protected]
Sent: Friday, March 8, 2013 12:31 AM
Subject: Re: (no subject)
Hi.
From: [email protected]
Sent: Friday, March 8, 2013 12:33 AM
Subject: Re: (no subject)
Good morning.
From: [email protected]
Sent: Friday, March 8, 2013 12:34 AM
Subject: Re: (no subject)
I already said that one.
From: [email protected]
Sent: Friday, March 8, 2013 12:36 AM
Subject: Re: (no subject)
Yeah, but it really is.
From: [email protected]
Sent: Saturday, June 8, 2013 12:42 PM
Subject: Re: hi
Don’t you hate it when people use smiley faces in their e-mails?
From: [email protected]
Sent: Saturday, June 8, 2013 12:59 PM
Subject: not really
From: [email protected]
Sent: Saturday, June 8, 2013 1:04 PM
Subject: Re: not really
I’m going to ignore that.
I read once that in Russia, they usually end the salutation of a letter with an exclamation point. Isn’t that funny? It must always seem like they’re shouting at each other. Or that they’re really surprised to find themselves in touch.