“Yes, ma’am, my name is Sergeant Devin Clay. I’m a U.S. Army soldier deployed to Iraq, and I just received a Red Cross message about my mother’s death.”
“Oh, I’m so sorry to hear that, Sergeant Clay, and I must say, thank you so much for the sacrifices you and your family are making.” Her words are saccharine sweet, but I have a feeling she does these sorts of calls entirely too often and her words are merely a script that runs through her head. I hear her typing away on the keyboard.
“Thank you very much, ma’am. Do you have any information for me?” I ask as she continues to type.
“Just … one … second … yep, here we go. Josephine Clay, myocardial infarction, died April 18, 2006. The funeral is on April 23rd.” She types again before continuing, “Now, Sergeant Clay, did your Command give you all of the funeral and travel information?”
“Yes, ma’am. Is there anything else I should know?”
“That should be it. Please give us a call if you have any problems with your travel arrangements. We are here to serve you, and again, if you don’t have any further questions, thank you so much for what you’re doing over there.” Her words barely register because my mind is on one thing and one thing only.
It’s been ten long years, and I’m ready to get my girl.
“No, I think I’m okay. Thank you, ma’am.” I quickly hang up the phone and snatch it back up again, dialing Katie’s number as fast as I can. With each ring, my heart pulses rapidly through my veins, a warm buzz sitting just under my skin. The excitement over seeing her is almost too much to comprehend, the thought of my mother no longer being on this earth, at least for the moment, being pushed beneath the surface.
“Devin?” Katie’s voice crackles over the line and I can’t help but smile. And then, without warning, an image of my mother and father holding each of my hands and swinging me in the air flashes in my head, bringing reality crashing down on me. Katie says my name again, but before I can answer, another memory comes barreling in. This time we’re walking through Cedar Point, looking for rides suitable for an eight-year-old. I’ve got a snowcone in one hand and a stuffed bear in the other.
My legs go weak and I yank out a chair before dropping onto it.
“Devin? Are you there?”
My chest tightens and nose burns, and when I open my mouth to talk, my voice is choked with tears. “Katie.”
“Carry On”—fun
“WYATT—”
“Come on, Katie,” he says, cutting me off, “I’ve been your best friend for years. And I was your fiancé, for cryin’ out loud!” Doesn’t he realize that this isn’t going to change anything?
Looking at my watch, I notice the time. “Wyatt,” I say, sighing, “can we talk about this later? I’m going to be late for my appointment.” Pushing the driver’s side door open, I step out of my car, shut the door behind me and click the lock before heading toward Dr. Perry’s office.
“Just say yes,” he says before giving a muffled apology for raising his voice. “Hell, you’ve already said yes, you just haven’t followed through yet. It’s dinner. One dinner. Give this to me, please.”
“Fine,” I relent, mostly because I’m getting tired of hearing him beg, and I’m hoping that I’ll be able to prove to him—once and for all—that we are over.
“Really?” I almost laugh at the shock in his voice. “Okay then. How about Friday night?”
“Friday night is fine.” Pulling on the door to the building, a gust of wind catches it and I grunt, trying to get it open.
“What time should I pick you up?”
Blowing a chunk of hair out of my face, I shrug out of my jacket and drape it over my arm. “You aren’t picking me up. This isn’t a date. I’ll meet you at Bobby’s at six.”
“Bobby’s?”
“Yes, Bobby’s.” I knew he wouldn’t like that. Bobby’s is a bustling café that is usually packed full of college students. It’s not a good place at all for someone who wants to have a nice, intimate dinner—which is exactly what Wyatt wants. “Now I have to go. I’ll see you then.” I hang up before he finishes saying goodbye.
Walking up to the building, I pull open the door and step into Dr. Perry’s waiting room.
“Good morning, Katie.”
“Morning.” I smile, signing in at the front desk before taking a seat against the wall.
“You can actually head on back. Dr. Perry is ready for you.”
“Thank you.” I drop the magazine I had just picked up and weave my way to Dr. Perry’s office. She’s already sitting in her plush chair, waiting for me with a giant smile on her face.
“Long time, no see, Miss Devora.”
“Yes, well, it’s been a long week,” I say, hanging my jacket on her coat rack before walking over to that beautiful floral-print couch that I love so damn much. Not.
“Tell me about it.”
I can’t stifle the laugh as I drop onto the worn cushion. “How did I know you were going to say that?” Dr. Perry laughs too, and without a second thought, I tell her absolutely everything that’s happened. We talk about Devin, and how I not only forgave him but let him back into my heart. We talk about Bailey and Wyatt and Mama, and when I’m finally done telling her everything about everything, she leans back in her chair and simply stares at me with a huge grin plastered to her face.
“What? What’s that look for?”
“I’m speechless.” She laughs again. “I don’t really even know where to go with all that.”
“Well, you could start with Devin. Do you think I’m stupid for letting him back in?”
“Do you think you’re stupid for letting him back in?”
“Nice deflection.”
“Thank you.” She nods, her eyes sparkling with amusement.
“I think it feels right. I think it’s the most right I’ve felt since before my dad died … hell, it’s probably the most right I’ve felt since before Devin left ten years ago. It’s like as soon as I opened my heart up to the possibility of letting him back in, all the remaining resentment and sadness over what happened with him just went away. Suddenly, the gaping hole in my heart wasn’t so empty anymore, and I like that feeling.” My shoulders relax as though I needed to get those words out.
“Sometimes in life, we have to go with our heart instead of our head,” Dr. Perry says, offering me a gentle smile “We have to trust that our heart will lead us on the right path, even if it’s not the path we originally expected to be on.” I nod, waiting for her to continue, waiting for her to give me the confirmation that I’ve already given myself. She smirks and shakes her head. “You’re not stupid, you’re human, and you’re in love.”
I suck in a sharp breath.
In love?
Am I in love?
Don’t get me wrong, my feelings are still strong … but in love?
“Don’t think too hard about that.” Dr. Perry scribbles something on her notepad before dropping it on the table between us. “It’s just an observation and not something you should be scared of. You’re an incredibly intelligent woman, Katie. You just managed to get off track, but I’m not really worried about you.”
“You’re not?” Really? Because I’m sort of worried about me.
“No.” Dr. Perry shakes her head and pushes a chunk of hair behind her ear. “You’ve got an amazing support system. I’ve watched you grow stronger every single time you’ve come in, and you’re starting to make tough choices without getting overwhelmed. Plus, when you walked in here earlier, you looked lighter than I’ve ever seen you look. You looked happy.”
“I am happy.”
“Good.”
“Can we talk about Wyatt now?”
Dr. Perry tosses her head back and laughs. “Absolutely! Let’s talk about Wyatt.”
“Am I leading him on by going to dinner with him?”