‘I understand,’ Marcus said softly. More than you know.

She glanced at him, guilt in her eyes. ‘I know you do. I know how you all worried when Mikhail disappeared. I’m sorry. I know Michelle’s family and mine aren’t the only families to who have suffered like this.’

‘That was hell,’ he murmured, but at least he’d only found Mikhail’s body. He hadn’t been there when he died. Marcus closed his eyes. He hadn’t had to hear Mikhail’s pleas for him to help. He hadn’t been so lucky with Matty. And he’d been too young to deal with it.

Mawcus. Matty’s screams, the screams of a toddler, permanently etched in Marcus’s brain. Mawcus. Normally Marcus could block them, pretend that he’d never heard them – when he was awake, anyway. Unlike Stone’s anguished cries, which he heard waking or sleeping.

Make him stop, Marcus. I just want to go home.

‘Marcus?’ she asked, her voice thick with concern. ‘Um, Marcus?’

Eyes flipping open, he swallowed a curse. He should have known she’d pick up on his slip. ‘How did you find her?’ he asked, trying to get her back on to her story and off his.

‘I got a text the next morning, from her phone.’ Another bitter smile. ‘I thought my prayers had been answered. The text just said to meet her behind the dorm, that she didn’t want any of the reporters to see her. Asked me not to tell her parents either, because she didn’t want them to see her that way.’ An audible swallow. ‘She texted me a photo of herself. I . . . didn’t recognize her right away. Her eye was black, her face bruised. She said that Trent Bracken had done it. I was devastated, but relieved that she was alive.’

‘Did you tell her parents?’

‘No. Her mother had looked like she’d break any minute. She hadn’t slept in days, not since Michelle disappeared. Michelle’s dad had finally gotten her to leave the church so that she could go home and sleep. I think he slipped her a sleeping pill, because he had to almost carry her out to the car. I figured I’d get Michelle cleaned up, put ice on her eye and then call her mother. That way her mom could get some rest and Michelle could keep some dignity.’

Marcus frowned. ‘That I don’t understand.’

‘Her parents didn’t like Trent. He was rich, they were blue-collar regular folk. They suspected he wasn’t . . . gentle with Michelle. But I don’t think anyone thought he was beating the shit out of her. Nobody but me. I’d begged her to leave him, and she’d tried. She’d broken up with him the day before she disappeared.’

She’d reached the Ledger office and pulled into a parking spot on the street, but Marcus didn’t move. ‘What happened then?’

‘Bryan had left just before dawn. He had a morning paper route, ironically enough. When I got the text, I called him to come get me and he dropped everything. I played it cool with Uncle Trace and the family still at the church, told them I needed to go for a run to clear my head. I met Bryan a few blocks away and he drove like lightning back to the dorm. Most of the reporters were gone. The few that were left were camped out in front of the building, waiting to catch anyone coming out for early classes. Bryan zipped through the alleys behind the dorms and nobody saw us.’

She fell silent, staring straight ahead, her eyes unfocused. Unfortunately Marcus had a good idea of what it was that she was seeing.

‘You found her?’ he prompted gently.

A nod. ‘Yeah. Bryan and I found her together. Trent had finished the job.’ A very deep breath. ‘I must have screamed, because before I knew it, the alley was crawling with reporters, the guys from the front who’d heard me and run around back. I had cameras flashing in my face and microphones shoved down my throat. I still had her blood on my hands. Literally, I mean. I’m surprised you didn’t find pictures in your own archives. If a Ledger reporter wasn’t personally there, the paper had to have run the story with stock photos.’

He’d find out as soon as he got into the office. ‘What happened then?’

‘Bryan got me out, called my parents.’

The sudden spurt of jealousy disturbed him. ‘He was close with your family?’ he asked.

A wan smile. ‘Mom always called him her seventh son. She still does. Dad took me home, made sure none of the press bothered me. Dad was already pretty high up in the CPD hierarchy, so nobody fucked with him.’ She took another deep breath. ‘So that is why I don’t like reporters.’

‘I wouldn’t either, in your place. But I’m not sure that would be my biggest problem.’

Her eyes narrowed dangerously. ‘What do you mean?’

‘I’d also feel like I’d killed my best friend.’

She glared at him coldly. ‘Your psycho-babble is as pathetic as Donny’s.’

He didn’t take her jab personally. ‘But that’s what’s really at the heart of this, isn’t it? You trusted someone who betrayed that trust, and your best friend died as a consequence.’

She was quiet for a long, long moment. ‘Yes,’ she agreed finally, her voice hoarse. ‘You’re right. Are you happy? You’ve dug it out of me. You can leave now.’

He reached over and gently gripped her chin, forcing her to look at him. ‘No, I’m not happy, Scarlett. I’m goddamn furious right now – for you. What happened to you was disgusting, and those reporters should have been ashamed. But I’m not going to apologize for something I didn’t do. And I wasn’t trying to gouge this out of you. We have secrets, all of us do. You’re entitled to the secrets you don’t want to share – except this one was impacting how you see me.’ He gripped her a little tighter, taking care that he didn’t hurt her. ‘Me, Scarlett. I am not the man who betrayed you and I am not the reporters who hassled you. I’m not going to sell your story or my soul to sell a few goddamn papers.’

He was breathing hard, his heart beating like a drum in his chest. Until her eyes cleared and her lips curved in a genuine smile.

‘I know you’re not,’ she said. ‘I’ve always known, but I didn’t want to trust my gut.’

‘Why not?’

‘Because I wanted you. Too much. I was willing to believe you weren’t what on the surface you should have been. I wanted you to be different, so much that it scared me. It still does.’

‘It shouldn’t. I’m not always the best man, but everything I’ve ever done I’ve believed to be for the best at that moment. Even . . .’ He released her abruptly, shaken by what he’d nearly confessed.

Her brows lifted. ‘Even what?’

Even murder. ‘I really need to go.’

She grabbed a fistful of his shirt and gave it a yank. ‘I told you everything, Marcus. Everything. Don’t you dare run away from me now.’

He was still breathing hard, but from panic now, not fury. Closing his eyes, he covered her hand with his, flattening her grip, pressing her palm to his racing heart. He thought she should be able to feel it even through the Kevlar.

‘Marcus?’ she murmured. When he didn’t say anything, she sighed wearily. ‘I told you what I did. My best friend is dead because I—’

‘You didn’t do anything wrong,’ he gritted out. He opened his eyes, met hers. ‘You didn’t kill anyone.’

She went very still, not breaking eye contact. ‘Whatever you did, it can’t be as bad as what I did, even inadvertently. Tell me. I trusted you. Please trust me.’

He swallowed hard, fighting to control his pulse. It’s only fair, he thought. She needed to know exactly who he was before this went any further. Before she gave him even more of her trust. He swallowed again, unsure if the panic was from the memories he’d never truly buried or his fear that she’d walk away once she knew the real him. ‘Google Matthias Gargano, Lexington, Kentucky, 1989. I’ll tell you the rest later.’ He let go of her hand and slid his fingers around the back of her neck, pulling her close for a hard, fast kiss that was all desperate need and no finesse. ‘You have a meeting. You’ll be late. Call me when you’re done.’