Nathan nodded. "I'll see to it at once."

As he stood, Richard, tightly gripping Nicci's hand, looked up at the tall wizard. "Nathan, there has to be something you can do."

"I can keep any more of them from getting through."

"I mean for Nicci. What can we do to help her?"

From the desolate depths of his own inner torment, Nathan gazed down at Richard. "Stay with her, Richard. Be with her until she's gone. Don't let her be alone in the last moments. That's all you can do now."

With a flourish of his cape he turned and rushed after General Meiffert.

CHAPTER 44

Cara, sitting on her heels beside him, laid a hand compassionately on Richard's shoulder as he bent over Nicci.

He felt dead himself.

He wrapped Nicci protectively in his arms, unable to offer her any real protection, any salvation-unable to offer her redemption from Jagang's claim on her life.

The totality of the events that had carried him to that point in his life seemed to overwhelm him. No matter what he did, the believers in the Imperial Order advanced their cause steadily onward. In their fanaticism, they were determined to wipe all joy from life, to squeeze any meaning from it, to curdle existence itself into unbearable misery.

Devoted to their mindless faith in a perfect, eternal afterlife gained through sacrifice of this life, the followers of the Order lusted to see to it that everyone who dared to want to exist for the sake of this life alone was made to suffer immeasurably for that singular, intolerable, sinful desire.

Richard hated them. He hated them passionately for all the harm they inflicted on others.

He wished he could wipe them all from the world of life.

Nicci, despite being largely unresponsive, tightened an arm around his neck as if to comfort him in his grief, as if to tell him that it was all right, that she too, like so many all around who had fought and died to defend their way of life, the right of their loved ones to live safe from violence brought against them for simply desiring to live free, would soon be at eternal peace beyond the reach of pain. Even though he knew that she would at last be free of terrible suffering, and out of Jagang's reach, Richard couldn't bear the thought of her leaving the world of life.

At that moment, everything seemed futile to Richard. Everything good in life was being methodically destroyed by people who fervently believed that their pious purpose in life was to murder those who would not bow down and submit to the Order's beliefs.

The world was in the grip of utter madness.

So many had already died, so many more would die. Richard felt as if he were caught in a whirlpool, forever being sucked down into the depths of despair. There seemed no end to the senseless slaughter, no escape from it but death.

And now Nicci was taking that final journey.

He had just wanted to live his life with the woman he loved, the same as so many others. Instead, Kahlan's mind had been stolen from her, leaving her a tool of those with a burning desire to either impose their beliefs on everyone or to destroy them all. While he might have helped Kahlan get away for the moment, Jagang's minions would be hunting her. None of them would ever give up. Unless they were stopped, the Order would have Kahlan just as it would have everyone.

Now Nicci was being slowly drained of her life as well.

As Richard turned inward, turned away from everyone and everything, he felt a sudden, violent, wrenching jolt within. For a moment it held him gripped in a strange and silent netherworld before tumbling him once again into an inner storm.

He didn't know the source of the inner disorientation, but it suddenly felt as if he had become lost among a million meteors. And then they all exploded outward from somewhere within the unfathomable depths of his being.

Cara grabbed his arm and shook him. "Lord Rahl! What's wrong? Lord Rahl!"

He realized that he was screaming. He couldn't stop himself.

Amid the incandescence, understanding overcame him.

He suddenly knew without a doubt the cause of the sensation.

It was an awakening.

The glorious power of that rebirth was staggering. Every fiber of his being was suddenly on fire with the life of it. At the same time, the marrow of every bone rang out in pain so monumental that it nearly rendered him senseless.

He could feel his birthright burning again within, feel himself whole again for the first time in what seemed forever. It was almost as if he had forgotten who he was, what he was, as if he'd lost his way and it had all suddenly returned in one blinding instant.

His gift had returned. He had no idea why or how, but it had returned.

The thing that kept him conscious, though, kept his mind focused, was his seething rage at those who through the self-justification of their own twisted beliefs harmed others who didn't think as they did.

In that moment as his blinding rage at all those who existed to hate and hurt others again flowed through that integral connection with his gift, he heard a metallic pop.

Nicci gasped.

Richard, almost unaware of what was happening, realized that her arms were around him, and she was gasping to catch her breath.

"Lord Rahl," Cara said, shaking him, "look! The collar came off! And the gold ring that was in her lip is gone."

Richard backed away to peer down into Nicci's blue eyes. She was staring up at him. The Rada'Han had burst apart and was lying broken behind her neck.

"Your gift is back," Nicci whispered, barely conscious. "I can sense it."

He knew without doubt that it was true. His gift had inexplicably returned.

He noticed a forest of legs as he glanced around. Men of the First File, weapons in hand, had surrounded him. Ulic and Egan stood between them and Richard. Between Ulic and Egan was a wall of red leather.

Richard realized that when the burning pain of it had exploded through him he had screamed. They had probably thought he was being murdered.

"Richard," Nicci said, drawing his attention. Her voice was little more than a weak whisper. "Are you out of your mind?"

She had to force her eyes open several times. Her brow was beaded with sweat. Richard knew that she was spent from the ordeal and needed time to rest if she was to fully recover. Still, it was profoundly heartening to see the life in her eyes again.

"What do you mean?"

"Why in the world would you paint those symbols in red all over yourself?"

Cara glanced over at him. "I like the look."

Berdine nodded from above. "Me too. Kind of reminds me of our red leather, but without the leather."

"It's a good look for him," Nyda agreed.

Even through her exhaustion, Nicci's expression revealed that she was not amused. "Where did you ever learn to do that? Do you have any idea of the danger those symbols represent?"

Richard shrugged. "Of course. Why do you think I painted them?"

Nicci sagged back, looking too weak to argue. "Listen to me," she said. "If I don't... if anything . . . listen-you can't tell Kahlan about the two of you."

Richard frowned as he leaned close, trying to hear her clearly. "What are you talking about?"

"It needs a sterile field. If anything happens to me, if I don't make it, you need to know. You can't tell her about the two of you. If you tell Kahlan about her past with you, it won't work."

"What won't work?"

"Orden. If you ever get the chance to invoke the power of Orden, it needs a sterile field to work. That means that Kahlan can't have foreknowledge about the love between the two of you or the memories can't be rebuilt. If you tell her, she will be forever lost to you."

Richard nodded, not sure what she was talking about, but greatly concerned nonetheless. He feared that Nicci might be delirious from the ordeal of the collar. She wasn't really making any sense, but he knew that it was not the time or place to get into it. He needed her fully recovered and thinking clearly, first.